I realize I’d make a lousy superhero. I’m way too much of a jerk.
If I had super speed, for example, I’d probably offer some kid a super speed ride to Paris or Egypt – and then when we got there I’d do something obnoxious like – fake sprain my ankle –
Oh! Oh! Ow! Ow! It hurts!
And the kid would be all freaked out – panicky, and crying. And I’d say something stupid like,
“Man – we better call your parents to pick you up. Hope they’ve got frequent flyer miles!”