your handwriting

JEFF
Is my handwriting messy?

Sophie glances over at a notepad with Jeff’s writing on it.

JEFF
Daphne said my handwriting’s messy.  I don’t think it’s messy.  Small – but it’s not messy.  At least I don’t write in swirls and flourishes –

SOPHIE
Write your name.

Jeff writes his name, hands the notepad to Sophie.

SOPHIE
I have no idea what this says.

JEFF
Oh c’mon –

She takes his pen and writes:  JEFF ROBINSON in large, readable, block letters.

SOPHIE
That’s what your signature looks like to you.

She writes a long squiggly line – that is clearly nothing but a long squiggly line.

SOPHIE
That’s your signature to everyone else.

 Jeff takes back the notepad.  A WAITER brings more coffee.

do i stink?

SOPHIE
Do I stink?

JEFF
No.

SOPHIE
Promise me, if I ever stink, if my clothes are too tacky, anything…

JEFF
I’ll let you know.

SOPHIE
Promise?

JEFF
Yes.

SOPHIE
And I’ll tell you.

JEFF
No.  I don’t want to know.

SOPHIE
You don’t want to know if you stink?

JEFF
No.  I’d rather just stink.